Sunday, December 14, 2014
So here we are again. Comparing this year to last, wondering why I didn't appreciate what we had. I had a husband that could walk, and dance, and light the menorah. We were not bed bound, he could communicate with his phone. And here I am, wondering if I will go through this again next year.
Is there a way to skip the first part, where I cry for days, and just focus on the amazing blessings we have? I don't even know how to do that. There is a cycle, with highs and lows. You can't just skip around can you? My moments (or days) of fears and pain have always helped me to a greater understanding and a closeness to Hashem. How can I do that without ruining Chanukah? I honestly don't know. I have two days to figure it out.
Monday, December 8, 2014
Tuesday, December 2, 2014
Our lives together have been extremely blessed, and may it continue to be so for many more years.
Today I want to Bless you, who have yet to find your Prince or Princess. You should know that Hashem has a special plan for you and a special person for you. We do not always see our pathways laid out nicely in front of us. That is because we are royalty, we are the children of the King. We are not the ones behind the scene planning and arranging, we just show up with our best self possible, and Hashem takes care of the rest. Be your best self, and trust in Hashem to make the plans. May we all say L'chaim together soon, at your L'chaim and wedding.
Sunday, November 23, 2014
Since my husband got sick, we have received an overwhelming amount of love and support, that I have always felt is a result of the Holtzbergs. The pain of loosing fellow Shluchim was too great and something to be avoided at all costs. I know that this doesn't ease the pain, yet within the pain there is so much beauty. So many boys and girls bearing the names of these giants that continue to have such great influence over our lives. The length we go thru to ease the suffering of our family members is a testament to the legacy of the Holtzbergs. They did not darken our lights they made us aware of how powerful it is. I am sure their holy Neshamas continue the fight upstairs, right next to G-d.
Very soon we will be reunited with all of our family. Our Patriarchs and Matriarchs, and the many giants we have lost.
Friday, November 7, 2014
I don't wish this life on anyone, but I do wish you would take the time, and smell the roses. Love the smiles of your family, speak and listen, and take the time before it takes you. Put what is important in your life on the front burner. Fix your regrets, and forgive those who have wronged you. Be full of love, hope, and joy as often as possible. Allow your imperfections to be what they are, and not who you are. Do not define yourself by your weaknesses and sad moments, you are so much more then that. Acknowledge your pain and put it in its place. Yet most of all, stare each other in the eyes and smile from your heart.
Monday, September 22, 2014
Monday, September 15, 2014
Friday, May 23, 2014
Friday, March 21, 2014
We all know this world has suffered many generations of tragedy and calamities, yet what we have experienced the last two months is different. There is no bad guy and no natural disaster, and while some have had serious sickness, many have been in apparently very good health, yet we have lost far too many. To me this seems very unnatural.
The world we live in is a world of G-dliness hidden within nature. When we see the G-dliness outside of nature, we call it a miracle. We are taught that this world is meant to function thru nature, where G-d remains hidden from us, and we will see revealed G-dliness when Moshiach comes and we are no longer in exile.
The past two months are supposed to be the happiest months in the Jewish calendar, yet we have seen tragedy after tragedy. We do not call it a miracle when we see G-d going beyond the natural realm in a negative way. The pain goes beyond what we as natural human beings can tolerate. Yet we are also beyond nature. We are G-dly beings. What we have done in the face of our heartbreak has been G-dly. We have changed the world in honor of our friends, our brothers, our sisters. We have reached beyond our pain, our breaking point is even broken. We have held hands, comforted each other, and vowed to do more then we already do from around the world.
So I say this is something different, something larger then what our brains can comprehend, yet our souls sense that G-d is doing something different. Something is changing, and we sense it when we wipe away our tears. This is it, the big one, what we have all been waiting for.
Wipe away your tears for Shabbos and recognize the change. Hope for what it is bringing and look forward to seeing our brothers and sisters again very soon.
May your Shabbos be special and beautiful. And May Hashem erase the tears from our faces forever.